Kindness

Yesterday while shopping at Wegmans I had an encounter with a woman over cheese and it made my morning.  

One of the biggest differences between the Rochester community and the Northern VA area is the demeanor of the public.  Shortly after moving, Wes and I quickly observed that people were just plain moody, most of the time.  Perhaps it was the maddening traffic, or the...um, traffic.  Either way, we were more likely to encounter random acts of rudeness, than kindness, while living in the NOVA area.  And while were not naive enough to believe that everyday here will be lollipops and butterflies, there does seem to be a CLEAR difference and we've already been reminded that acts of kindness far outweigh those of rudeness in our community. 

Take for example my cheese incident.  I hadn't even been in the store for 10 minutes before random strangers struck up pleasant conversation - the cheese woman was proceeded by a nice elderly man who chatted with me while we shucked our corn.  I typically shopped at the Wegmans in Fairfax every other week, or so.  I never once, I repeat NEVER, had a random conversation with another customer.  We lived there for 2 years!  And boy did I try - I'd make a stupid comment about the aisles needing stop lights, after almost running my cart into someone trying to cross that treacherous gap to the other side, or smile and try to talk about the freakin weather while waiting in the awkward space by the deli.  I would either get ignored entirely (which I preferred), or the miserable person would shoot me a nasty look continuing to go about their important shopping business.  The worst were the times when waiting in line behind a cute little kid in a cart; I'd try to make faces or play with the child and they would reach out and slap me!  Ok, that's a lie, but do you get my point?   

My point is, that life is more pleasant here - for us at least. :) 

Back during graduation season, George Saunders gave the convocation speech at Syracuse University. You may have already encountered this article on the web; it seems to be everywhere, but if not and you have a bit of extra time, it's worth a read.  His advice centers around kindness.  

You can read the full speech here.  

p.s. 

1. Me and the nice cheese lady share a love for Lorraine swiss.
2. Wes and I deemed the rude citizens mentioned above, as "DC Royalty." 

The Little Tree that Could...

Last school year, as in 2011-2012, I stopped at Wegmans early one morning to pick up a few things.  While there, I decided to purchase a cute little plant that was on sale for like $3.99ish.  It adds such a homey feel to have some greenery in the classroom.  Well, I have to say, it was the best 4 bucks I've spent in a while.  With a little love and care from the absolutely wonderful Carla, the custodian who cleaned my classroom, the tiny plant blossomed into a tree!  Unfortunately, I don't have a photo from when I first got it, but for perspective, it was about the size of the basil plant below...  

Check it out now!

Carla was in love with this plant - she would water it for me each day and even watched it over the summer last year so I didn't have to lug it back and forth.  As I'm writing this, I'm feeling more and more guilty about not leaving it with her.  She even came into my classroom on the last day of school to kiss it goodbye.   I considered leaving it with her, but I guess was feeling attached to it myself.  Instead, I plan to buy her a new plant to tend to, with a note, written in spanish (thanks to the translator at my school), thanking her for the love and care to the little plant that could and my classroom, of course. :)  She always reminded me about the happiness that can come from the simple things in life! The world needs more Carla's. :)

Anonymous Parking Lot Bully

Here's a short story with an important message for your Thursday afternoon:

Title:  Pay the Opposite Forward

Characters:  Jaime, Wes and the anonymous Parking Lot Bully

Setting:  Lee Highway/N. Kirkwood Rd. intersection inside a Nissan Rogue

Plot:

Jaime's Tuesday began early at 6 a.m. with a refreshing yoga class.  This was a particularly rewarding class, as she was able to get into a new yoga pose that she'd been reaching for in the previous several weeks.  As she drove home, excited to share her accomplishment with Wes, the beautiful morning sun was peeking over the horizon.  This is going to be a good day! thought Jaime, with a happy smile on her face.  

Arriving home to a still sleeping Wes, Jaime went about her morning business of checking her favorite blog, practicing that pose again to be sure she really had it and preparing a few special packages to be mailed home.  

Fast forward an hour or so...

With the sun now higher in the sky, pouring down over Arlington, Jaime drove Wes to work in her Nissan Rogue, when the unthinkable happened.  As the car eased to a stop at the intersection of Lee Highway and N. Kirkwood Rd., Jaime's eyes were drawn to an unfamiliar object flapping underneath the driver side windshield wiper.  "Wes, there's something on my windshield!  What could it be?!" she cried out in panic.  The always cool, calm and collected Wes replied, "I'm not sure, why don't you get it?  The car is stopped at a red light, after all."  And so, with nervous hands, Jaime opened the car door slowly, reached around to the front windshield and retrieved what appeared to be a ticket.  And this is what she found: 

Folks, if your reaction was anything like Jaime's, it went a little something like this...

(I'll spare you the expletives that poor Wes had to suffer through for the remainder of our drive, and just say that I probably would have been happier had it actually been a parking ticket.)  

Back to the story...

Jaime wasn't quite sure why this incident, which was probably hopefully someone trying to be funny, bothered her so much, but it did.  Sure, life in Arlington could be trying, but she was usually able to laugh these things off.  This time, it was something more.  But what?

As she drove back home and ever so carefully parked her car back at the scene of the crime, it dawned on her - it was just plain MEAN!  Maybe she was parked like a "jacka$$;" honestly, she couldn't remember if she was perfectly parallel with the yellow lines or not, and figured she probably wasn't, but did that mean that she should be subjected to such bullying??  What if I had just heard some terrible news and wasn't focusing on parking like a perfect citizen?! she thought, blood boiling.  

Marching into Potomac Towers mad at the world, Jaime suddenly realized how much she was letting this coward mean bully get to her and thought that instead of allowing him/her to ruin her entire day, she should take the advice that she gives to her 1st graders when confronted with a bully: use an "I message" and let it teach you to be kind. 

And so, not having the actual Parking Lot Bully in front of her, she imagined a disgruntled Virginian, mustered up the most assertive voice she could and spoke out loud to the imaginary bully:  "I feel angry when you put mean notes on my car," and then spent the remainder of her day trying to be kind to others.